So for the longest time I have been Dictator of Cynical Island. I gave up the title when I was happily (and even for quite a good bit of the time when I was unhappily) in love. However, if you know me well, you know that I am a hopeless romantic. I believe in love at my very core… probably more than I believe in anything else in this world.
Recently, I’ve become slightly obsessed with reading the Modern Love column in the New York Times. I think it’s some form of masochism because more than anything it makes me sad to read about so much of modern dating. I know I can’t possibly be the only person in her 20′s that is tired of the push and pull of modern dating and the various forms of commitment phobia that manifest themselves in our social interactions these days.
I have to say I’ve been lucky. I mean my ex and I are obviously not together. However, at least she had the decency to actually date me. In fact, all of my actual exes have been good like that. But I’ve found that it’s increasingly difficult to find anyone that actually wants to date anymore and I simply don’t understand this concept. Or even better ones who think that dating consists of “hanging out” but “not defining” the relationship. Personally I call that “fucking around”. But hey, what do I know? I mean I am “romantically challenged” after all. Perhaps I’m too demanding or it’s just intimidating to meet a girl who knows what she wants. But if I’m into you, don’t expect anything less than to be truly courted and I will not be ok with just “fucking around”. However, meeting someone that I’m actually into is excruciatingly difficult. So I’ll be honest, I don’t often meet anyone I’m interested in more than just sex with. And it’s not like I won’t tell you if I don’t want the same things as you do (as nicely as possible, I hate hurting people’s feelings but I hate leading them on more). And don’t try and convince me that it’s ok to just continually float from person to person “hooking up”. Been there, done that, have the postcard. It’s honestly, not that satisfying. Sure it does pass the time but if you’re looking for a real connection, hooking up is not the way to go. Perhaps taking a chance that love might exist and going on a real date is the way to go.
Maybe it’s just that the “hooking up” culture was in its nascent form when I hit high school and college so out of my friends group a significant number are either married or in a very stable couple or at the very least in some way want that someday. We believe in dating. We believe in love. And we believe in forever. Ok, maybe not *all* of my friends do but I’d say there’s a large majority of us that do.
Having said that, I’m still confused why so many young people are addicted to this culture of no-strings when that’s not what I think anyone is actually looking for. While I was reading Modern Love, I stumbled upon this series they did a while ago about how college students feel about love. There are two pieces that break my heart. One is written by a woman who is talking about how even though she tries to keep herself detached what she really wants is something more permanent. The other is written by a young man who talks about how insecurity keeps so many people from finding something more real but how in the back of your mind you still want that real connection.
So I think it’s about time I reclaim my dictatorship and as my friend B says, “all we need are a few good guinea pigs 
”
scratch any cynic and you’ll find a disappointed idealist
[george.carlin]
Crème Caramel is simply amazing… or at least in my opinion it is a little piece of heaven. Now I don’t often blog food because well I love food but my mom has been holding our Larousse Gastronomique hostage.
And well it’s really the only thing I cook out of… actually that’s not entirely true anymore, I’ve recently discovered some awesome food blogs. But that’s a very very recent thing, like last 6 months kindof recent so I still haven’t gotten quite into the food blogging yet.
But in some of the most exciting news I could ever possibly get, apparently Amazon has made it such that the Larousse is searchable online!!! No, really I’m not kidding, this book is my bible. I think it is the absolute best way to learn how to cook. Granted it’s not easy and it’s definitely not really a step by step guide, but it is the definition of the grammar of cooking. At least that’s how I look at it.
In my excitement I was talking to my friend, Jess, about it and I promised her a recipe. It’s my take on their version of Crème Caramel. So the first time I made it, I followed Larousse to the letter. But there was one day when I messed up a little but I mean it wasn’t a lot and I figured well what the hell let’s see what it does to the recipe, if it’s awful we don’t *have* to eat it, right? (Granted that goes against every principle my mother raised me to have but you gotta learn somehow, right?) Anyway it turns out that I (and everyone else) rather loved my little accident. So from that day onwards this is how I make my crème caramel.
Crème Caramel (serves ~10-12)
6 whole eggs
6 egg yolks (note you can use the leftover egg whites to make meringues!)
1 quart of whole milk (folks, this is dessert not even remotely healthy, if you don’t use whole milk it simply is not going to taste as good. just trust me, it will be worth it.)
3/4 cup sugar (this you can modify as you get more comfortable with the recipe, I don’t like mine to be super sweet so you might want to use more – the original recipe calls for quite a bit more)
1 vanilla bean (or you could use 2 tsp vanilla extract but the actual pod really does make a difference in flavor)
Pre-heat your oven to 375 degrees. In a medium pot bring the milk to a boil with the vanilla bean. After it begins to boil take it down to a simmer and add in the sugar (taste this to see how sweet you’d like it to be). Allow it time for the vanilla to infuse so you want this to take about ~15 mins. In a large bowl blend the whole eggs, egg yolks. Remove the vanilla bean from the milk. Then gradually add the milk to the mixture, whisking quickly while doing so. Coat the bottom of a souffle dish (or any other bakeware that you’d like to use for this) with caramel.
(To make the caramel – take a small pan and place of very high heat. Pour a good amount of sugar into the pan and wait for it to caramelize. To help speed up the caramelizing process you can add little bits of water to the sugar periodically.)
Now pour the custard you just made into the souffle dish on top of the caramel. Place the dish into a bain marie (water bath) – I typically use a 1.5″ deep pan filled with water and with the souffle dish placed in the water, it’s relatively easy to make a makeshift bain marie without going out and buying something expensive. And place into the oven. Bake for about 30-40mins. You can check to see if it’s done by sticking a fork into the center, if it comes out completely clean then you’re all set – if there is anything at all sticking to the fork keep it in the oven until the fork comes out clean. Once it is done take it out of the oven and out of the bain marie. Let it sit out to cool. Quite frequently I will put it in the refrigerator to let it cool. When you are ready to serve bring out a fresh serving dish and then turn it over onto the serving dish. Also if you just trace the edge of the dish with a knife it’ll make it that much easier for it to slide right out and look just beautiful on your serving dish.
Oh and I just realized this is totally a gluten-free recipe. So all you gluten-free lovers this is just a wee piece of heaven that I happen to adore.
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