Category: random

Just What You Need…

by rhealitycheck

And sometimes when you let yourself believe, life gives you just what you need.

I spent 12 hours at work today and I came home to my roommate and his date watching tv in our living room. I had completely forgotten that he told me he had a date he was bringing home. I only remembered once I walked in and saw a strange guy watching tv on our couch. I was totally expecting to not want to talk to them at all and was ready to be annoyed at having to deal with people after an exceptionally long day at work, especially after the last couple of weeks I’ve had being nice and making pleasantries was the last thing I wanted to do. However, I was pleasantly surprised while saying hello to the two of them when my roomie’s date just spontaneously said, “You’re beautiful.” It was even funnier when my roomie vehemently denied putting him up to it, which I believe because Adam never lies. And quite frankly I’m not even sure he would think of putting him up to it. Regardless, it completely made my day.

I guess I’m just a sucker for flattery. And gay men. Though in all seriousness sometimes life can surprise you just when you thought everything was going all wrong. In just the way you need and you didn’t even know.

I Believe…

by rhealitycheck

Well, ok, so I tend to try to keep this blog relatively impersonal but due to my life being a crazy mess at the moment. But this is about things that I think are really, really important to remember.

I believe in love at first sight. I believe in fairy tales. I believe in miracles. And I believe in “meant to be”. I believe in rainbows and fairies and kittens. I believe that life works out for the best even though sometimes it feels like it just can’t get any worse. I believe that sometimes the world just doesn’t know what’s good for you. I believe that the best things in your life could be something that at one point you thought was horribly wrong. I believe that something good can be taken from any situation. I believe in hope. I believe in looking at the sunny side of the street.

I realize that a lot of this sounds ridiculous and excessively perky but it’s how I make it through the hard times. Cynical as I am about the world at large, I have to believe the best in people because otherwise I don’t think I would be able to get out of bed in the morning. I believe that the world is a beautiful magical place and it’s up to us to find the beauty in it. I think that so many people forget that. Especially during the hard times. I know I certainly have struggled with it at times.

In fact, recently I forgot how much these things meant to me, which is why I’m writing them down here. I think that often people overlook the power of positive thought and optimism. Just because you’re an optimist doesn’t mean you aren’t in touch with reality at all. I think I have a pretty decent sense of reality, I just happen to think that taking the good things out of any situation is just far more pleasant than remembering the bad. I guess I just wonder about pessimists because if all you ever notice are how wrong things can go then what is the point of living? For me, I think even in the worst of times there is something out there that can make you happy. And if nothing else there is the hope for the future and all the possibilities that may bring.

And so, I believe. I believe that everything happens for a reason. And that life always works out for the best. I believe in hope and possibility but also in reason and science. I believe that rose colored glasses make life a little more bearable. I’m sure many people will think it’s weird that I consider myself to be a physicist and still say that I believe in miracles but I do. In fact, I think many of the things that physics proves are little miracles and that progress in and of itself is a little miracle. I believe there is magic all around us, if we just keep our eyes open we might just catch a glimpse of it. And I believe that the world is full of love, we just have to open our hearts and you’ll be amazed at what you can find.

Fabulous Not-So-Obvious Find

by rhealitycheck

So perhaps I am extremely vain but I go for a full body wax once a month and have been doing so for some time now (a bit over two years). And just recently my old waxer, Jane, decided to go back to school and so I had to find myself another salon. Now thankfully, Jane knows Chicago extremely well and since she wasn’t planning on continuing any of her services at all, not even by getting space at another salon she gave me a couple of recommendations. So I just chose one at random, it seemed like the one that was closest to me that she had mentioned by name. When I walked in to Deeba’s Salon (2752 Devon Ave, Chicago, IL 60659, 773-465-9685) it seemed like any other salon in the Little India section of Chicago. It was clean but nothing terribly fancy and lots of women busy with their threading, which is probably the most popular service they offer.

Now I can’t say that I have ever had such a great experience in my life. My waxer, Saleha, was very young and still in high school but she was quite friendly and helpful. She was extremely professional and I would recommend her to anyone who would choose to walk in. I cannot explain just how thrilled I am with the level of service. I have never had such a painless and comfortable wax ever. And the threading services they offer are simply superb. I certainly think it’s worth the trek out to Little India just to go here.

“Beggars Can’t Be Choosers”

by rhealitycheck

Oh but what about when they can. I have recently been doing a lot of volunteering at the Lakeview Pantry which is my local anti-hunger pantry that serves the Lakeview neighborhood in Chicago. All they ask their clients to bring is some form of ID and some proof of residence within their borders because Chicago is huge and they can’t serve the entire city’s population. But I think they do a great job in the neighborhood. So enough of my little shameless plug about how great the pantry is. The reason I started this post initially is that while I’ve been working there, I have simply been amazed at what some people will be choosy and difficult about. It’s so interesting to see people complain about what can be given to them when almost everything there including the people serving them is free and being given by the good will of others.

It’s also quite amazing to see the difference in reaction of the people that come through there. There are some folks who come through and only take what they can use and will tell you that, which is great because then nothing is being wasted even if they don’t take the full amount of what you are offering. And there are those who are so very grateful that we are there and will thank us profusely because this economy has simply made food unaffordable. I find that I have a much stronger appreciation for exactly how lucky I am just by spending some time there.

A Sad Farewell To A Real Innovator

by rhealitycheck

Whatever one might say about Michael Jackson, no one can deny that the man was extremely talented and changed the face of music. I do not believe the world has seen such genius in ages. He changed the entire shape of how popular music was viewed and what performers were expected to do. And he began his magnificent career at the age of 5.

People have speculated for a long time about how messed up he was and all the drama surrounding children but this is a man that was in the spotlight from a very small age. And not just one of those one-hit wonders or children in commercials etc, this is someone who was literally a huge star – comparable to Mozart in my opnion, simply due to the age and the type of change he created – from the age 5 onwards. I think to expect perfection in our celebrities/public figures is a bit much considering humans are inherently flawed. I think the loss of Michael Jackson is the loss of someone truly remarkable. It’s always a sad day when that happens. I surely hope that people will remember him for the innovative genius that he was and not the drama that surrounded his later life.

A Review of “He’s Just Not That Into You”

by rhealitycheck

Ok, so I haven’t read the book. I’m only judging the movie… currently. I may read the book because while I liked the movie as being your typical “chick-flick-feel-good-everything-turns-out-great-in-the-end” kind of movie, I take issue with the entire concept of a book and/or movie that feels the need to tell women “he’s just not that into you”. That being said I do love your typical chick flick so needless to say I did enjoy the film even though I do have some critiques of the premise. Warning: there are spoilers ahead – not big ones but if you haven’t seen the movie and don’t want to know anything about it, don’t read this post.

For one, I’d like to believe that we are not that stupid. It’s not like women truly don’t know when a man “is just not into” them. Sometimes people choose to believe things that are irrational. And let’s face it women aren’t the only ones. Walking out of that film my friend and I were thinking the exact same thing: why isn’t there a book/movie called “she’s just not that into you”? Honestly to be so presumptuous as to think that the female population actually needs a book called “he’s just not that into you” really bothers me. Personally, I’d like to give us a bit more credit because the female population of the world is honestly not that stupid. In fact, I’d say we are better at reading cues than our male counterparts.

Now one of the issues I had with the movie was that what it seems the premise would be is that we are not the exception but rather the rule. So if a man isn’t calling you back or whatever that he’s just not that into you. Granted I think that’s just common sense but that’s neither here nor there. But what I found to baffling is that everyone found some sort of happy ending. And really, most of the women ended up being the exception and not the rule, which I thought was rather sad if this movie was supposed to be “different”. Or perhaps, I just need to lower my expectations.

I have to say one of my favourite parts of the movie was when Drew Barrymore goes off on a rant about how dating these days is just so confusing because there’s myspace, email, twitter, texting, your work phone, your cell phone and your home phone, if you still have one of those. Technology really has made dating a completely different game and she did leave off my most favourite form of confusion which would be facebook. I find that technology can just make dating far more difficult than it really needs to be. I also find that being able to “stalk” your crush online to be a bit tricky to handle because I mean what is the dating etiquette of when to contact the person you’re interested and how or why.

On a completely unrelated sidenote, I just realized that Holi (the Hindu festival of colors) was on my birthday this year and I totally missed it. What a bummer. That would’ve been the best way to celebrate my birthday ever. (Not that my birthday wasn’t great, it was the best one in my recollection so far).

The Mosaic Post

by rhealitycheck

DIRECTIONS:
– Go to Google image search.
– Type in your answer to each question.
– Choose a picture
– Use this website ( http://bighugelabs.com/flickr/mosaic.php ) to make your collage.
– Save the image for use in this note.
– Post and tag all your friends.

QUESTIONS:
1. What is your name?
2. What is your favorite food?
3. What is your hometown?
4. What is your favorite color?
5. What is your favorite movie?
6. What is your favorite drink?
7. What is your dream vacation?
8. What is your favorite dessert?
9. What is one word to describe yourself?
10. How are you feeling right now?
11. What do you love most in the world?
12. What do you want to be when you grow up?

mosaicsmall

Exclusivity In Relationships?

by rhealitycheck

I’m starting to wonder if perhaps my view of relationships might be a bit skewed. I’ve gotten a few different opinions from several friends and I thought I saw a trend for a while about how they view exclusivity but I am now at a complete loss because it seems to be completely random. Personally, I find dating to be stressful enough as it is without trying to decipher how to approach exclusivity much less assumptions made about exclusivity.

One thing I find particularly interesting is that there are quite a few people that I’ve spoken to who believe that if you have been seeing someone for a period of time and have been “staying over” at each other’s places then the assumption would be that you are exclusive. Now, I don’t think that it would be out of the question that most likely, you are being exclusive, but at the same time to assume that the person you are seeing is on the same page as yourself is fairly severe assumption. At least in my opinion it is. I suppose this is partially due to the fact that (hypothetically) if my significant other hadn’t asked to be exclusive or if I hadn’t asked then I would assume that should I meet someone that would like to go on a date, I would have no problem accepting. Granted for the most part when I am at that stage, I don’t tend to be looking out for anyone else and I doubt I would accept an offer from someone else but I also don’t think it is something that can be assumed. Perhaps it is just that I like to be deliberate about knowing where things stand.

Sunday Morning Reads

by rhealitycheck

I have a tendency to flip through my Sunday T Magazine a bit quickly because I should really be doing homework and not reading the paper for fun – especially not the style magazine of all things but I very rarely can resist. It is my favourite part of the Sunday paper, I just adore looking at all the beautiful clothes and new styles but I often find that I don’t see many articles that truly catch my attention (I’m more a science section fan in that regard).

So imagine my surprise when I found the article “Butch Fatale” and my delight when I saw the fabulous outline of Rachel Maddow. As a member of the queer community it is always a pleasant surprise to see any such thing put in to the news. Especially into T Magazine, I mean that’s a pretty great place to be. It’s interesting because the article speaks of how lesbians very often overlooked in the gay community and for that matter pretty much everywhere else. I mean there are always more than enough lesbian stereotypes to go around the table but if anyone should ask what would image would you conjure of a “hot” lesbian, I don’t think anyone could answer it. There are just too many differing views. And honestly with lipstick lesbians running about how do you even know if they’re gay? But Daphne Merkin makes a great assessment when she said that the lesbians finally have a real icon to turn to in Rachel Maddow. Maddow has captured the hearts of gays & straights, men & women… in fact, I’d say she’s bewitched pretty much anyone who leans a touch left. I’d say that’s score one for the girls that so very often get overlooked. I mean who wouldn’t want to be funny, smart, well-respected and a bit of a wallflower if you could be like Rachel Maddow? I certainly would. In the words of Daphne Merkin, I am offically a fan that “Lesbian Glamour Steps Out of the Closet” in the form of Rachel Maddow.

My next fabulous find of the morning was a piece on the absolutely classic, timeless packaging of Chanel No. 5. Perhaps it is simply because No. 5 happens to be one of my all time favourite fragrances or perhaps it is because there are certain packages that I just adore (Chanel No. 5 being one of them) that I love taking a look at how it came about. I mean I think Gabrielle Chanel was one of the most forward thinking women of her time to be able to come up with such timeless classics. I mean to understand how to imprint something into one’s memory in that way takes talent that very few people have. I always tend to relate these things to the only other thing that I think has such a timeless quality and that is the little blue box of Tiffany & Co. I know being part of the queer community that this may sound a bit like a pipe dream but I have always said whoever gets me a little blue box or a little red box (Cartier, of course) will have my hand. While I may not be entirely serious about it since I do believe in spending the rest of your life with the person you love, not just anyone that gets you the ring of your dreams but it would definitely make me think twice before refusing should it not come from the person I was hoping. Granted this is all theoretical since I am nowhere near decisions like that but I think the fact that so many of my very near and dear college friends are getting married that it does make it stand out a bit more. Not to mention in the midst of the recession things like engagement rings and Chanel just cheer up the spirits a bit. At least they do for me.