Forget All Those Diets, This Is Really How You Lose Weight

by rhealitycheck

So I’ve lost 27lbs this year and really the bulk of it, 17lbs I lost in the last two months. I lost them strictly due to stress and anger. It’s amazing what the body can do when you put it in a stressful situation. And if you reduce your eating to about a tenth of what you normally eat and you don’t sleep for more than 4 hours a night (and even then that’s if you’re lucky). You’re really changing your body’s patterns. Not to mention that stress and anger burn calories all on their own like you couldn’t imagine. Combine that with a need to release tension and add a good several hours of exercise a day just to work off all the excess energy you have from stress and anger and you’ve got a sure fire way to shed pounds very very seriously.

Now in case anyone missed the sarcasm in my tone, I do not actually believe any of this is a good or healthy way to lose weight. Effective, yes. Healthy, not even close. However, the first 10lbs I lost the old fashioned hard work way and I really believe that is the way to go. I mean yes, I am happy to have a better body image due to my circumstances but I can promise you I felt much better about how I got my body to start changing when I did it the right way. It’s not by following some miracle diet. In fact, I didn’t follow any diet. I simply ate when I was hungry and an amount that lead me to feel full but not overly full and to institute exercise in my routine. I go to the gym (or play soccer) 6 days a week. I’d like to do it 7 but I know that realistically I have to allow myself at least one day off. Seriously, diets are not effective it changes your patterns for a short period of time and the weight will come back. If you just make healthy changes in your lifestyle and commit to raising your metabolism it will work. It will just take time. It took me 3 months to lose 10lbs but man did I feel really successful when I did it. I’d even say it feels much better than losing nearly 20lbs in less than 2 months because I know that the first time around I was trying and I was taking care of myself. The second time around was due largely to external factors. And of course, I’m a girl so I have my own set of body image issues but it really is far better to do it the way you feel accomplished as opposed to a way where you feel like you cheated the system.

Fabulous Not-So-Obvious Find

by rhealitycheck

So perhaps I am extremely vain but I go for a full body wax once a month and have been doing so for some time now (a bit over two years). And just recently my old waxer, Jane, decided to go back to school and so I had to find myself another salon. Now thankfully, Jane knows Chicago extremely well and since she wasn’t planning on continuing any of her services at all, not even by getting space at another salon she gave me a couple of recommendations. So I just chose one at random, it seemed like the one that was closest to me that she had mentioned by name. When I walked in to Deeba’s Salon (2752 Devon Ave, Chicago, IL 60659, 773-465-9685) it seemed like any other salon in the Little India section of Chicago. It was clean but nothing terribly fancy and lots of women busy with their threading, which is probably the most popular service they offer.

Now I can’t say that I have ever had such a great experience in my life. My waxer, Saleha, was very young and still in high school but she was quite friendly and helpful. She was extremely professional and I would recommend her to anyone who would choose to walk in. I cannot explain just how thrilled I am with the level of service. I have never had such a painless and comfortable wax ever. And the threading services they offer are simply superb. I certainly think it’s worth the trek out to Little India just to go here.

What Happens When There’s Trouble In Paradise?

by rhealitycheck

There is this absolutely fabulous article in the New York Times about what happens when your marriage (or relationship) is falling apart after years of things being just fine. The title of the article is Those Aren’t Fighting Words, Dear and she goes on to speak about how to relate your loved one saying that they want to end things or that they don’t love you and choosing not to believe them. I may be a novice at relationships but I truly think that the advice she gives is pretty darn amazing because no matter if you have been together for 6 months or 60 years there are times when things will be difficult not because of you but for reasons outside of you. My best friend was talking to me the other day and her philosophy of life is that if you make yourself happy then everything will fall into place. And it’s taken me a while but I do actually believe that. Controlling everything around you is certainly not possible and sometimes you need to let the person you love rail and rage and storm all around you and just try to weather the storm. I don’t think it’s easy and it’s actually quite difficult to do in practice but I think once you realize this it’s possible to make it out the other side a much stronger couple. And I’m aware that this is not a “fun” prospect and it can be quite wearying and the natural reaction may be the exact opposite but I think if you can hold yourself up and remember what makes you a healthy, whole, happy person independent of the “us” then you can make the “us” stronger, much stronger in fact. Sometimes through the obstacles and through all the challenges we find what we are actually meant for. Being able to deal with a major crisis and still love each other through it and after it are what is most important. It is so easy to lose sight of and to get caught up in everything else that is going on around you. But if you are able to hold on to those key reasons that make you love that person. Then you have found something worth saving, you have found something worth “fighting” for.

“Beggars Can’t Be Choosers”

by rhealitycheck

Oh but what about when they can. I have recently been doing a lot of volunteering at the Lakeview Pantry which is my local anti-hunger pantry that serves the Lakeview neighborhood in Chicago. All they ask their clients to bring is some form of ID and some proof of residence within their borders because Chicago is huge and they can’t serve the entire city’s population. But I think they do a great job in the neighborhood. So enough of my little shameless plug about how great the pantry is. The reason I started this post initially is that while I’ve been working there, I have simply been amazed at what some people will be choosy and difficult about. It’s so interesting to see people complain about what can be given to them when almost everything there including the people serving them is free and being given by the good will of others.

It’s also quite amazing to see the difference in reaction of the people that come through there. There are some folks who come through and only take what they can use and will tell you that, which is great because then nothing is being wasted even if they don’t take the full amount of what you are offering. And there are those who are so very grateful that we are there and will thank us profusely because this economy has simply made food unaffordable. I find that I have a much stronger appreciation for exactly how lucky I am just by spending some time there.

A Sad Farewell To A Real Innovator

by rhealitycheck

Whatever one might say about Michael Jackson, no one can deny that the man was extremely talented and changed the face of music. I do not believe the world has seen such genius in ages. He changed the entire shape of how popular music was viewed and what performers were expected to do. And he began his magnificent career at the age of 5.

People have speculated for a long time about how messed up he was and all the drama surrounding children but this is a man that was in the spotlight from a very small age. And not just one of those one-hit wonders or children in commercials etc, this is someone who was literally a huge star – comparable to Mozart in my opnion, simply due to the age and the type of change he created – from the age 5 onwards. I think to expect perfection in our celebrities/public figures is a bit much considering humans are inherently flawed. I think the loss of Michael Jackson is the loss of someone truly remarkable. It’s always a sad day when that happens. I surely hope that people will remember him for the innovative genius that he was and not the drama that surrounded his later life.

Has The Infatuation Worn Off?

by rhealitycheck

It appears that at least for Maureen Dowd it has, which makes me rather happy because it did get a bit tiresome to read her generally quippy columns that were just glowing reports of the soon-to-be commander-in-chief. This most recent op-ed was actually quite refreshing as she brought up our fearless leader’s ability to crush a fly and I quote:

If only the president could be so brazen about pushing through gay rights and health care.

Thank you, Ms. Dowd. I couldn’t’ve said it better myself. I sure wish our fearless leader would be a little more fearless with things that mattered than with, say, a fly.

This has actually been quite a sore point for me recently because I have quite a few friends (who just happen to be straight males) that have been so baffled by the reaction of many gay activists at Obama’s inaction. Personally, I think we should let gay marriage go through the states before we try any federal action, it just seems to be a bit premature to me but I can understand why many people are upset about it. They backed a candidate who pledged allegiance to equal rights but is now incredibly quiet on the issue now that he is in office. I find that disappointment quite understandable, though considering he did say on the campaign trail that he does not believe in gay marriage even though he does believe in equal rights I am not all that shocked. So in general, I’m quite glad that some of the Obama fan camp are actually looking at him objectively.

Separate But Not Equal

by rhealitycheck

I am truly disappointed with the latest ruling from the California Supreme Court. It’s amazing that even the Republican Governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger, supports gay marriage and yet it got struck down. What I find so fascinating is that in the weeks leading up to this decision there are quite a few states that have begun to allow same-sex marriages. In fact, New England has been trying to become the first “region” to allow same-sex marriages everywhere. It appears that they seem to think of it a bit like a challenge of who can be the most open-minded though I’m not sure the rest of the country got that memo.

And the idea has been raised that there were 3 states that have either passed legislation or court decisions that allow same-sex marriages or have submitted legislation that is very likely to pass may raise the question, “What if the religious right doesn’t have so much power?” It’s an interesting position but I’m not sure I believe it completely. This article at slate really made me consider this seriously and I think it would have held more ground had it not been for the fact that the California Supreme Court sided in favor of Proposition 8.

Also, why is it that this is such a new concept? I mean ok, I’ll admit that transsexuals are not the most commonly discussed topic but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist. So what happens when a man marries a woman but then one of the two decide to undergo a sex change and they are still together. Does that mean that their marriage is no longer legal? Or is it legal? Or can they even get divorced at that point? It really raises a lot of very valid questions. This op-ed piece really made me think about it a lot. I’ll admit I hadn’t considered the argument before I read this but I think it’s a very valid one. And surely makes life so much more complicated.

I think the part that I don’t understand the most is how anyone can view this as anything but inequality.

It’s Like Dr. Doolittle

by rhealitycheck

Well perhaps a little different but I was certainly super excited to hear about this study in this morning’s paper. Apparently there are some scientists who have managed to extract the human language gene and insert it into mice. Now tell me, how cool is that? Because I think it’s pretty darn cool. Some days I really wish I went into research, there are just so many mind-boggling things discovered like that all the time. Granted, I’m sure there are a lot of failures that go along with it but just think of how cool it would be to have a talking mouse!

I wonder what this would mean if we actually managed to create other animals that could talk. How would that change the balance of the world? I mean I would imagine that humans have this ability which has given us an edge over the rest of the animal kingdom. I mean we don’t have the sharp teeth or nails or really many other mechanisms of defense. What we do have is our intellect and our ability to communicate in a very robust manner. I mean if other animals could communicate in the same robust manner that we do would that mean that we are leading the way to our demise? Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think we should stop this research because I think it is seriously awesome. But I do wonder what the implications could be.

Actually it sortof draws my mind to Wicked, I don’t recall the play as well but in the book there were animals and Animals. The Animals were conscious and had the ability to speak and understand language whereas the animals were like those in our world. It would be interesting to see if something like that could happen in reality. And also I always wonder why we humans want to dress animals up in clothing. Perhaps if they had the ability to communicate they would tell us that fashion is a ridiculous social construct. And that walking on two legs is for the birds. But who really knows? There are so many possibilities.

The Spring Program at The Joffrey

by rhealitycheck

This past weekend I saw the Spring Program at the Joffrey Ballet and I think what I was most surprised about was that the theater was half empty. I mean it was just unreal. It’s amazing to see how significantly the recession is effecting everything. The part I found most amazing was that the least expensive seats in the house were completely empty. It’s fascinating that everyone has cut back so much. Even with the bailouts, there is such an impact to the arts. I find it quite tragic because I thought the performance was quite stunning.

I have to say I wasn’t a huge fan of the first piece which was Les Noces – choreography by Bronislava Nijinska, music by Igor Stravinsky. The music was stunning but I wasn’t really into the way Nijinska choreographed the piece. I think I tend to like dances that flow a bit more. To be sure the dancing was beautiful and the choreography was certainly dramatic, just not my style.

Now the second piece, Valses Poeticos – choreography by Helgi Tomasson, music by Enrique Granados, was absolutely stunning. I loved it. It was a piece between two dancers with the pianist on stage with them. It was so simple and delicately done. It was literally like watching a love story played out in front of your eyes by these artists with no words needing to be said.

I also loved the third piece, Round of Angels – choreography by Gerald Arpino, music by Gustav Mahler. I wasn’t really expecting to love this piece at all because I thought it was just some art-house thing about angels. But I believe this is what they call poetry in motion. Literally. It was so visually stunning. It was a piece all about lines and how bodies in motion can look so artful together. I think this was possibly the most visually appealing piece I have ever seen.

The last piece, Carousel (A Dance) – choreography by Christopher Wheeldon, music by Richard Rodgers, was quite good but nothing in comparison to the two in the middle. It was certainly interesting and beautifully danced, just not quite the same dramatic effect of Round of Angels or the incredible simplicity of Valses Poeticos.

I would recommend that if you have the time and the finances and if these pieces are performed anywhere you can find them. I would recommend going to see them. I know that the economy makes things difficult right now but I have always believed in supporting the arts. And I get calls from the opera, symphony and ballet in Chicago, so I know they must be having a difficult time. While I can’t commit to being a subscriber, I certainly do try to make the performances I can budget in.

Holding On To Hope

by rhealitycheck

This is something I have to remind myself all the time. Or well, not all the time, when things are going well there is no need to try to hold on to hope because things are great. But currently with the economy in state it is in and everyone’s job security being up in the air. It’s a rather tense environment in general. With more people being laid off every day, sometimes it is difficult to keep your spirits up.

I’ve noticed that even in my social circle (friends, family, coworkers etc) there are a lot of people that have been getting rather down about it. And I’m sure listening to my pep talk isn’t always helpful considering I try to be a bright ray of sunshine all the time. But there is actual logic behind it. I’m not just trying to be an ass, I do believe that having a positive attitude about the whole job search process is really important. If anyone you are speaking with can detect that you are defeated or unhappy they are far less likely to want you on their team. I mean think about it logically. Would you rather have someone who is confident, bright and positive on your team or someone who is self-effacing and doesn’t have much confidence? Sure the self-effacing person might have better skills but it is hard to see that in an interview. I mean if you bring personality to the interview it can last twice the time it would if you don’t. And let’s face it the more time someone has to get to know you is probably better because a 20min interview is not doing anyone justice. The basic idea of this is that when you have a winning attitude and can keep yourself positive no matter how bad things get then people can’t tell just how bad things are.

I think it’s somewhat like an Asian concept where you have the face that you show your family and the face that you show the rest of the world. It’s actually fairly prevalent in India and China, I’m not sure about elsewhere but I believe many Asian countries have this concept. It’s like that old adage “don’t air your dirty laundry in public”. Sometimes people find these practices antiquated but I still believe there is some value in these practices. Perhaps not quite as extreme as they used to be but it is far more pleasant to speak with a well-put together, organized, attractive person than it is with someone who is clearly downtrodden.

I think the most difficult thing to maintain through job searching is maintaining a positive self-image. In today’s society it has become ever more prevalent that our self worth is reflected by what our “position” in society is which is generally tied with your career. So when that is gone or is difficult to maintain it generally has an impact to one’s ego. The key is to make it appear as if that isn’t true. Or not just to make it appear so. I like to believe that I have value regardless of what anyone else thinks. I think having a good sense of self will keep that value regardless of the economic troubles and whatever hardships one has to go through. I’m not saying it isn’t difficult to maintain, it takes a toll on everyone. But if you have a good sense of self it is harder to take away.

So essentially, I am trying to keep my faith that things will get better. And that some day I will find the dream job that I am looking for. In the mean time I will try to hang on to what I’ve got for now and make the best of a bad situation.